These Poems are very dear to my heart. When first coming out to my family as a lesbian, not many people were accepting of what I was going through. At one point I felt very alone, but comforted by my writing. I wrote both of these poems during this time. After reading them recently, all of those old memories of that time came flooding over me. Only this time I could realize the exhilarating feelings of sexuality were present in my writing. This was neat to look back upon and return to those feelings of sadness, hurt, loneliness and the most important of the feelings expressed in Rainbow Runner – no matter how hard the fight I will always accept myself for who I am. Thanks for looking!
Exile
I enjoyed the sight of the crimson spell
seeping downward like the chime of a bell does disperse.
Pleasuring in the soft leaden ooze of its warmth,
I bathed in its satin ecstasy uncaring
while sin contaminated every surrounding thing.
My thoughts, my words, and my writings
soon metamorphosis into the satisfyingly wrong,
my ultimate evil.
Outside the soul there lurked none the wiser,
no a ruined selves, and so no demolished goodness.
Time came to sacrifice and let Death
originate from my own life.
The pain and the anger, the explosion of emotion
and the inward crypt of solitude
withdrew me into my corner.
Detached from those who were worthy,
I fulfilled my own set prophesy,
for I lived a life deep within the crevasse of banishment, shame…
Exile.
Rainbow Runner
I’m running down a rainbow.
Sometimes I stop and walk,
but mostly the world absorbs me
into its great mystery.
The sky blends perfectly into the street,
and the trees stand stark and reaching for the clouds.
My heart beats, and my nose itches,
and my eyes feast
upon the wonder that I live and breathe.
However tumultuous the storm can be,
I’m running down a rainbow,
straddled between a dream and reality.
Angela Bradley-Volz 